Still Alive
Hey, I'm not dead. Things are going well for me but my focus has shifted away from writing to speaking. 
I have also reached a point in my life where I must absolutely strive to not burden anyone with anything and to freely stand strong alone. So, I'm focusing on that too.
'Cause that is how a man does it.
Ooooh, how sexist. Please, spare me the "pleasantries".
Anywho, be back in a long while. Unless something really interesting happens.
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To a bittered stranger:
[You got the message. Godspeed.]
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To the collective past:
I regret the circumstances that led to our estrangement. Maybe it was the distance, the excessive preoccupation with career and work, or it was simply me - at least, the past "me". Clinging to past bonds and seeking inclusion only to experience exclusion has been unhealthy and a source of pain for me. It seems that no matter what, I cannot undo the conceptions that have been built. Yes, I haven't been there and I guess haven't been "cool" enough. And it seems God has placed me on this separate path away from what I used to know and love for a reason and I cannot fight it any longer; I simply have lost the energy and it would be foolish to keep resisting. I feel many have grown indifferent or unforgiving of my behavior. I guess those coincidences and circumstances that drove me away happened for a reason and my efforts to hold on have failed for a reason.
And so, I must stop trying so hard, thinking so much, and burn the bridges that have long since deteriorated beyond repair. Perhaps we can start again anew if He would allow it - and if you would allow it. I do welcome it. I do wish for stronger bridges to be forged. If there is one lesson I learned through this long arduous road, it is that the present is what matters most. Keep holding me accountable to my dark past and I have no choice but to leave you there for the sake of my own health and progress. I haven't "been there" but I am here now and I gotta keep moving forward. And for as long as I have two strong legs, I musn't cling and drag another person down for help in this long adventure.
I do pray that you return in my future but if it is not in His will, I remain grateful for the memories. I must walk this path proudly, with or without you. Though, I'd be delighted if you choose to be the former but I know we all have our paths. I think it is finally time I accepted mine being so divergent. ;p
